I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
