oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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