I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize