Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
