yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
