you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
