i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
