YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
