How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
