is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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