is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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