he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
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Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
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I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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