You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Randomize
