I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
