I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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