he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize