i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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