so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
