but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Randomize
