Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK