You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Randomize
