You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
