If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
