We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
