Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Come see our sink grown plant.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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