My brain says no but my pants say off.
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
