You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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