she told me i tasted like america
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
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