Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
