i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
