I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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