my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
the room spins SO much faster in panama
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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