dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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