I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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