I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
