remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize