she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
