don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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