Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
