he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left an ass print on the piano.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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