I threw up into my coffee this morning.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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