you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
