There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
