You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
sarcasm needs its own font
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
