party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
