afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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