i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
