i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
