i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
