I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
