My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
