You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize