I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
do herpes really smell.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Floor bacon is actually really good
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
